Frozen

Parents of young children will understand the power of the movie Frozen. Likely, the movie will permeate your soul through having watched it over and over again. 

You will know exactly which songs pop into your head when you open up the safety gate at the top of the stairs, and when you finish the part of the sandwich that your child doesn't eat at lunch time.

And, for those of you living in Saskatchewan, you can sympathize with the people of Arendelle.

Potty Training

After getting into a comfortable routine with a couple of 30 month-old toddlers, we decided that it was about time to embark on a new challenge. 

We had made a couple of attempts at potty training at times in the past, with limited success.

Let me tell you that potty training can be a frustrating time if you let it get to you. We treated the process as a learning experience for everyone involved, and I am proud to report that we are now 50% completed.

I won't tell you which twin won the potty training challenge, but most of you can probably guess who it was. 

Don't Turn your back on a Toddler

Once a week, I take a half-day off work to stay home with the kids, while Amanda goes to work.

It is at this time that the kids recognize that they are dealing with the weak link of the parenting team and conspire to come up with ways to pull a fast one on their father.

Yesterday, while my back was turned for a split second, focused on making lunch for the kids, Pritam decided that it would be the perfect time to give herself a haircut, using scissors that I had provided to her for a snowflake craft project.

I learned a valuable lesson yesterday... if it is too quiet, the kids are up to something.

Lazy

I'm pretty sure that most blogs die after the initial honeymoon period.

You start off really excited to chronicle your daily or weekly musings, only to find that life throws a series of obstacles in your way. After a few months of excitement, you get busy. You have to choose between shaving, video games, household chores, or blogging,. From time to time, you question whether you really even need to have a blog at all.

Anyone that is both a blogger and a parent of a toddler will understand that time is a precious commodity, and a blog will often be left by the roadside to make room for your favourite TV shows, fantasy baseball pools, gardening,  or personal grooming.

I think that, what I need to remember, is that my blog will ultimately be forgotten by everyone else. This record of my life as a parent will ultimately be a personal memoir. If I don't keep up with blogging, then I will be the only one who loses out.

All By Myself

Life with twin toddlers means that you don't get a lot of free time to yourself at home. You come home from work, then there is a daily routine of: 

1) feed the kids;
2) clean the fallout from the meal; 
3) bathe the kids; 
4) read many books;
5) sing many songs;
6) put the kids to bed.

Last week, there was a reprieve granted. Amanda and the kids went to Estevan to visit Grandma and Grandpa. 

So, instead of my regular evening routine, I found myself watching movies, eating in front of the television, and reading books that don't have pictures and rhyme. 

As great as this sounds, it was sad to see our copy of Goodnight Moon sitting unread on the table, and Darshan's "nink"* standing by itself in the upstairs hallway.

* Darshan refers to his water bottle as his drink, but in toddler speak, the "dr-" becomes an "n-" occasionally

Everyone came back home on Saturday, and the house was back to it's usual musical state.  

Road Trip 2014

Travelling with 2-yr old twins from Regina to Vancouver and back was a lot of fun. 

However, it was also a lot of work. 

Keeping toddlers strapped into car seats for hours at a time can make them ornery. We kept our travel days short and took long breaks. 

But the key to keeping our sanity was our built-in DVD player in our minivan. That, and a great selection of kid's movies, including:

The Gnome-Mobile

Annie

Mary Poppins

But, the whole adventure came together through the planning and hard work of Saskatchemom, who thought of every little detail to make the trip perfect for the twins.

Nobody likes rain storms....except kids.

Rain pours down all weekend. Water seeps into basement. Garden is flooded out. 

What kind of crazy people would actually be happy with this kind of weather? 

Toddlers!

Admit it...your inner child is screaming out to you to buy some rubber boots and to splash in some puddles.

Father's Day

The best Father's Day gifts are the ones that are homemade.

This video will be hard to beat in future years. Although, with kids these days, and advancements in technology, Pritam and Darshan will likely be able to program robots or holograms to send me a Father's Day message in 2025.

Link: VIDEO

Bring your kids to work day

It is a good idea to occasionally bring your kids to work. Nothing livens up the atmosphere at your workplace like the sight of 2-yr old twins crawling through the hallways, pretending to be puppies. 

If you are really lucky, your kids might even create some artwork to adorn the walls of your office.

Caught up to the Present Day

After a whirlwind recap of the past two years, this blog has finally caught up to present day.

I feel like I rushed through the past two years, overlooking events that probably seemed that they would be unforgettable when they were happening.

But one cruel reality about parenthood is that, as so many new experiences and amazing memories are being experienced, some of the things that were once memorable are now lost and forgotten. 

The dust on the road of life is swept away. 

Milestones

After the twins had their second birthday, it seemed like there were new milestones every week. Expanding vocabulary, developing mobility, intricate dance moves...it seemed like there was something new every day.

It's amazing to see children grow up, but time also brings a sense of wistful nostalgia, as you think about how your little toddlers are no longer the babies they once were.

One day, the front wall comes off the crib, and now they have toddler beds.

This bed will never be a crib again, but I think I can handle that. 

Fun times in Punta Cana (Part II)

Looking back at our final days in Punta Cana, our experiences do not seem as bad as they were while we were living them.

I am not ashamed to admit that I was very afraid. I had searched medical websites and researched possible complications from Hand Foot and Mouth Disease and looked at the dangers of children with ear infections flying on airplanes.

When Pritam woke up one night writhing in inconsolable agony, I was terrified that something was horribly wrong (this turned out to be pain from the ear infection).

As the date of our scheduled return flight approached, we began to make preparations to stay longer until Pritam's ear infection might clear up. We also kept a close eye on Darshan, who had started to develop a few spots on his hands. We looked ahead to later flights to Toronto, Calgary and Edmonton. Our Air Transat tour representative was very reassuring in telling us that he would take care of us if we were forced to stay longer.

We went to see the resort doctor several times each day to check if Pritam's ear infection was improving with a new course of antibiotics.

On the date of our return flight home, several hours before our scheduled shuttle departure time, the doctor gave us the news we were praying to hear. Pritam's ear infection had cleared up and she was able to fly!

Normally, going through the process of traveling home from the Dominican Republic would have been a stressful ordeal. But the next 12 hours were made easier by the relief we felt by simply being able to go home. Not often does one get excited about leaving +30 Celsius weather to get somewhere with -30 Celsius weather.

The cold Regina wind felt good that night when we arrived at midnight. We were home.

Fun times in Punta Cana

As this blog speeds ahead to present day, we come to January 2014.

Courtesy of very generous grandparents, we were able to take a much-needed winter vacation to Punta Cana in the Dominican Republic.

Everything was going smoothly. The kids were enjoying the swimming pool, the beach, and the warm Caribbean sun.

Darshan was learning the intricacies of chess. 

The first week of our vacation was idyllic.

And then came the second week...

It started with the kids getting more and more irritated. Then spots started to appear on Pritam's hands. We immediately worried that she was getting chicken pox. The resort doctor (who was amazing!) found that both kids had ear infections and suspected that Pritam had come down with Hand, Foot, and Mouth Disease. This was later confirmed by the pediatrician at a local hospital.

To protect the general population, we had to keep the kids isolated in our hotel room, while taking turns making trips out to secure supplies.

To make matters worse, Pritam's ear infection was not clearing up with the first set of antibiotics she was taking and we were at risk of not being able to fly home on our scheduled flight. 

How will this harrowing tale end?

Stay tuned next week for the stunning conclusion.

Visit with Santa

Most kids love Santa. But there is an age where a child's love of Santa can be in direct conflict with a child's fear of strange new people.

In December 2013, these two emotional forces collided at the Victoria Square Shopping Centre. I took the twins to visit Santa while their mother, Saskatchemom had gone to Minot to help shop for her sister's wedding dress.

I brought the kids to Santa's Workshop, and seeing their eyes light up with delight, I decided that it was time to allow the twins to become personally acquainted with Santa.

And at a distance of about 1.5 metres from Santa, the kids stopped. Apparently, this is the precise distance where a toddler's "stranger repulsion field" makes it physically impossible to continue to approach someone. Tears were shed. Eventually, by placing myself between the kids and Santa, a passable photograph was obtained.

You would think that the kids would be emotionally scarred from such a traumatic incident.

Instead, to this day, they look at their personal photo collage boards hanging in their rooms and squeal with glee..."Santa!!!". 

Wow...I've got good looking kids.

Everyone looks at their own kids and thinks that they are the cutest kids in the world. 

And we're all correct.

Letting go

As babies become toddlers, they start to do more things independently. 

In the summer of 2013, Pritam and Darshan were starting to feed themselves on a regular basis. I had to fight the urge to pick up the spoon and feed them. 

Surely, the numbers of stains and messes would have been reduced if I chose to feed the kids myself, but I came to realize that part of parenting is to let kids learn by doing things themselves.

Another part of parenting is to buy a lot of cleaning supplies and stain remover.

Cake Overdose

Never turn your back on a one-year old.

This entry serves as a cautionary tale. Back in early February 2013, we were celebrating Pritam and Darshan's first birthday party.

Things were hectic. We were busy preparing food, serving guests, tidying up and performing a variety of other tasks.

We assumed someone was keeping an eye on the twins. We were wrong.

While no one was looking, the kids devoured the icing from their birthday cake.

That led to Pritam being awake most of the night, hopped up on birthday cake.

Before the carnage

If you look closely at the picture, you can see the gleam in the kids' eyes, formulating their plan for cake annihilation.

Traveling with Babies

Over the last two years, we have taken numerous trips with the children. We have flown to Vancouver, Florida and the Dominican Republic.

Our January 2013 trip to Naples, Florida with the children was the first major travel adventure with Pritam and Darshan. This trip took place in the final days of my four-month parental leave, and gave us the opportunity to escape the frigid Saskatchewan winter for a month, courtesy of my generous in-laws, who hosted us in their Florida condo.

I think it is safe to say that I was stressed out when thinking about the logistics of a 12 hour travel day, with 3 flights (2 transfers - one in Denver, one in Chicago).  Scheduling meals, drinks, entertainment, and naps for twin 1 year old babies was a scary thought.

It's a good thing that my amazing wife, Saskatchemom had spent a tremendous amount of time and effort in organizing all of these details.

Before and during the flights, all I could think about was how things might go horribly wrong....what if the kids don't nap all day and cry through the whole flight?...what if we can't get access to water to make formula?...what if I leave one child at home and he/she is forced to defend the house from burglars? (Don't laugh. It has happened before.)

I learned something about parenting during that vacation. Your imagination is your worst enemy. Things never go as badly as you imagine them going.

And also...it's worth going through a little bit of hardship to get to the final destination.

Priorities

Through the first year of being the father of twins, I have had to make many difficult choices.

For example, I chose to watch playoff hockey games in 4X speed so that I could watch them in under 1 hour. This seemed to correspond to a 75% reduction in my disappointment in the Vancouver Canucks' performance on the ice.

With time at a premium, many regular activities were cut out from my daily routines. Much to the chagrin of my wife, shaving became something that decreased in frequency in 2012. 

For me personally, I enjoy looking back at the pictures from Beardfest 2012.  It will be a constant reminder of the days where I chose to spend time with Pritam and Darshan instead of spending time on personal grooming.

PS - Don't worry Saskatchemom, never again.

It gets better.

After slogging through the trenches for week after week, it is difficult to see an end to the battle. You solve one problem, and a new one pops up. 

Switched sleep cycle, constipation, reflux, colic...

Friends of ours told us that things tend to get easier after a few months. At the time, we could not see it happening. We were starting to get worn down. If not for the amazing support from our parents, I don't know how we would have survived.

Due to the feeding schedule assignments, in April and May of 2012, I was going to bed at 8:30 pm, so I could get some sleep before waking up at 2:00 am to help with the night feed. 

The daily grind was starting to crush us beneath its cruel sharp heel...until something miraculous happened. The twins started to sleep through their 2:00 am feed. Combine this with the fact that only one parent was needed to now feed both babies simultaneously, this meant that Amanda and I could both get a full night's sleep. 

This was the big break we were looking for.

Sleep Deprivation

Let me give you a summary of April to June 2012...
Wait a minute, those memories are no longer clear in my head. 

Where did they go?

I'll tell you. They vanished into a haze caused by 3 months of chronic sleep deprivation.

It's a good thing that I posted a lot of pictures on the internet to help me look back at a time of my life that has mysteriously vanished.

I have no recollection of this dance party.

Making mistakes.

Darshan Ross Marcotte Sarai, after a 10 week stay in the NICU, came home April 8, 2012. His sister would spend the next two days at the NICU until her graduation date.

We were now, for the first time, full-time hands-on parents. How long did it take to catch ourselves making our first parenting mistakes? 

It happened the first day. We decided to proceed with a family Easter Sunday dinner that had been previously scheduled before knowing Darshan would be coming home. The house was filled with a myriad of new sounds and new smells, and poor little Darshan, accustomed to a very different environment in the NICU, was completely overwhelmed. 

Parenting lesson learned: Kids can handle change, but they prefer consistency.

It ain't easy...

For all the emotional trials of having twin preemie newborns in the N.I.C.U. (Neonatal Intensive Care Unit), there is a silver lining for the parents. Someone else is taking care of your children most of the time. Rotating shifts of nurses are feeding, changing, bathing, and playing with your babies while you are not there. Now don't get me wrong. We were not sitting at home living it up. I would come to see the babies before work, and after work, and sometimes again in the late evening. I was given tips from the nurses on how best to feed the babies, how to swaddle them, and I took on a series of minor tasks to help the nurses in their daily routines. 

In the 9 weeks that the children were in the N.I.C.U., I was given the chance to ease into full-time, hands-on parenting, and had a series of advisors to help me through the process ... nurses, doctors, social workers, other N.I.C.U. parents

No one ever wants their baby to have to spend time in the N.I.C.U. after they are born. But, in the future, when you look back on that time, you realize that there were so many things that the N.I.C.U. experience provided you - information, support, training - and you realize how blessed you were to have had access to such an amazing facility.

Flashback to January 30, 2012 - Part II

These pictures are still difficult to look at, two years after they were taken. Pritam Rolande Marcotte Sarai and Darshan Ross Marcotte Sarai, arriving 10 weeks early, came into this world, each weighing in at a mere 2 lbs, 9 ounces.

Amanda had only briefly seen Pritam in the O.R., before going under general anaesthesia. While recovering in the Mother - Baby Unit, I went over to the N.I.C.U. to take these first pictures of the twins to bring back to show to their mother and both sets of grandparents. You can't really prepare yourself for times like this. You are forced to deal with events, knowing that outcomes remain outside of your control. Such is parenthood.

Flashback to January 30, 2012 - Part I

After 3 weeks of bedrest, and 10 weeks earlier than anticipated, Amanda was rushed to the Labour and Delivery Ward of the General Hospital Castle.

Things were moving pretty quickly here. I should have been very afraid at this point. But unfortunately, there really wasn't any time to be afraid, or to process any emotions. I waited patiently for the doctors to allow me to enter the O.R. 

The lives of the twins and their mother were now in the hands of the amazing staff at the Regina General Hospital.

Plan for a Minivan

The months after our return to Regina proved to be full of excitement.

In August 2011, we discovered that Amanda was pregnant.

In October 2011, while my parents were visiting from British Columbia, we went for an ultrasound, and discovered that we would need to buy a minivan.

Made in France

Here begins the magical journey of a father of twin two-year-old children.

This tale begins in July 2011, in Lyon, France. Amanda and I had planned our last major vacation before having children. Enjoying the food, wine, and sights, little did we know that 29 weeks from that date, our lives would change forever.